The gift of the Holy Spirit
The following is my personal testimony concerning the work of the Holy Spirit in my life. Without question it is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me! To those who would say it was for the early church but not for today, I say, "Look around! Do we need the Holy Spirit less today than they did then? I don't think so!"
Additionally, I would like to recommend an excellent book on the subject. The title is, "Joy Unspeakable" by Martyn Lloyd-Jones. It is rich with biblical truth and historical accounts of many who also testify to experiencing the wonderful things I am about to share with you!
An unquenchable thirst
I was saved in the summer of 1984. At the time of my encounter with the Holy Spirit I had been saved about 2 1/2 months. I knew without a doubt that I was saved. I had a very firm faith in the Lord. I was extremely eager to grow spiritually and understand all that I could about my new relationship with Him. I can remember having an unquenchable thirst for everything that had to do with Jesus. I definitely had the desire to commit my entire life to Him!
During this time a well known Evangelist came to Milwaukee. I had planned to go and hear him speak on a Friday evening. As events turned out, however, I ended up having to attend on Sunday. This was the day, I was later to learn, that they gave the invitation to receive the baptism in the Holy Spirit.
I went with a longtime friend that I knew before I got saved. He came more as a doubter and mocker than anything else. We sat through the music and message, during which I was constantly distracted by his offhanded comments. I was pretty disappointed because I had come with a serious heart to know the Lord and I couldn't even concentrate on what was being taught! But then suddenly everything changed.
As the minister came to the conclusion of his message he began to speak of the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I was hanging on every word he spoke. My heart was pounding inside of me as I knew that I needed to respond to his invitation to come forward for prayer. A young woman seated next to us began crying profusely. I watched her get up and head down the aisle to the front where people were now gathering. I remember thinking she was a bit unstable and over emotional!
Still, everything in me was wanting to go to the altar area which was quickly filling up. (This took place in a large coliseum). Finally, I told my friend I was going. Hundreds of people by that time had gathered. So where did I end up? Right next to that crying woman! I thought to myself, "Oh please! Give me a BREAK!"
Baptized in the Holy Spirit
They gave a short exhortation from the scriptures explaining what we were about to do. After that they began to pray that Jesus would baptize us in the Holy Spirit. There seemed to be at that time an almost tangible power present. These things are hard to put in to words, but it was as if the air was thick with the power of God. I had never experienced anything like that before. It was an extraordinary sense of God's presence.
There was a prolonged period of prayer and worship. It appeared that many people on all sides of me where deeply affected. I however seemed more on the outside. I felt more like an observer than a participant. This went on for quite some time. I was afraid the prayer would end soon.
One thing you need to know is that I was not about to fake an experience. I was very firm in that. I told God just how I felt about it, "I'm not going to fake it. I don't feel a thing. I'm not going to cry, or fall down, or speak in tongues or whatever." I felt that if it was real He could give it to me, and I told God that.
I was more than willing to walk away if that was how it was going to be, but I would not fake it. I continued in that attitude for a long time and had pretty much given up on the idea that anything was going to happen. Then suddenly, without warning, God's Spirit fell upon me!
I became so enveloped that my surroundings seemed to be gone. It was like nothing I'd ever felt before. The sense of God's love! And His peace!! It was both profound and personal. As near as my heart, and as vast as the universe all at once! I began crying; sobbing, deeper than I ever had. I felt the weight of my sins in stark contrast to God's holiness...and yet, there was no question that He loved me!
The thought of that was more than I could take in. I don't think I have ever cried as hard. In that moment it was clear that nothing was hidden before God. He knew me. I became very aware of my filthiness and I remembered past things I'd done... and yet, He loved me!
And He spoke to me. Whether it was audible or not, I don't know. But there were distinct words that I heard-
"I have seen the vilest things you have ever done, and I love you."
He saw it all, even the things no one knew about, and He loved me! You want to talk about crying? What a flood of tears! It wasn't that I was so lovable, I knew that for sure. It was that Jesus had taken my sin. I was accepted without question because of what He'd done. I was loved COMPLETELY!
His love poured out
Nothing was ever the same after that. I was forgiven, I was clean, I was loved, and I was certain of it! All of this was true, of course, from the day I first gave my life to Jesus. The Spirit of God, however, is able to make all of it much more real. He is the One that shows
us Jesus!
After that time the reality of God was immediate, personal and pronounced. It seemed that Jesus had come from being a mile away to right in front of my face! His love had been poured out into my heart, along with His peace and joy. Jesus was all I could think about!
Along with those things, came a greatly heightened awareness that God is holy. Many things that I had previously done without any thought of being wrong, now were seen as definitely sinful.
And the Word of God! It seemed like a different book. Alive! Speaking to me! I had an overwhelming love for His Word after that. I read the entire bible through TWICE in the following three months!
Finally, I became a witness. I couldn't stop talking about Jesus. Before I was pretty quite about things, now I was telling just about everyone I met, "Man! You gotta know Jesus!" It was by far the most radical thing that has ever happened to me.
The Father in heaven gives the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!
Will God do the exact same thing in your life? I would not for a minute expect that. He will do just as He pleases with each of us. What you experience will vary because God tailors things in an individual way to relate to you. However, His Spirit is a gift that God desires to pour out upon each of His children. And you can be sure that it is a gift that will make a big change in your life!
As with anything, the place to start is prayer. Open your heart and desire Him... in your own way, ask Him to pour out His Holy Spirit on you. Spiritual hunger and thirst is good. Instead of letting your dryness discourage you, let it drive you to seek Him. Keep praying! I have seen it over and over again how God poured out His Spirit on people after a season of prayer. The timing is for God to decide. I've seen people grow restless and wonder why nothing appears to change. I've also seen those same people, because of their hunger for God, just continue to pray, and in His time and way, experience the blessing!
"If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!" -Luke 11:13