As I was writing my post “Fellowship in the Spirit- the beautiful side of house church” I began reflecting on what it’s been that’s made my house church experiences so memorable.  What was that intangible thing that was thick in the air and breathed the very life of God into our gatherings?  The only word I could come up with was “Koinonia”.

As I look back over my life as a Christian there are certain times that seem especially marked as “heaven on earth“.  Gatherings with God’s people that pulsated with life!  They stand out to me as day compares to night as being imbued with the very life and presence of God among His  people.  They came as close as I’ve ever imagined it would be like had I been part of the early church in the book of Acts.  The only word I can find to describe those times is “Koinonia’.

And so I decided to just look that word up again, and ponder it’s meaning:

“Koinonia is the anglicisation of a Greek word (κοινωνία) that means communion by intimate participation.”  (Wikipedia)

Wow!  Communion by intimate participation!   No wonder my fondest memories of church have been in the context of house church!  It’s the setting of house church that most readily provides the atmosphere for Koinonia to take place.  Koinonia involves intimate participation and most church structures are simply not set up for that.  In contrast to traditional churches, house churches have a unique structure that actually encourages Koinonia to flourish!

From Wikipedia:

“Fellowship is never passive in the meaning of koinonia, it is always linked to action, not just being together, but also doing together. With fellowship comes a close and intimate relationship embracing ideas, communication, and frankness, as in a true, blessed interdependent friendship among multiple group members.”

Does that remind you of anything?  1 Corinthians 14:26 perhaps?

“What then shall we say, brothers? When you come together, everyone has a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation. All of these must be done for the strengthening of the church.”

Koinonia isn’t just one person doing everything; it’s not a spectator event.  In fact, it’s not an event at all- koinonia involves fellowship- in the Spirit, and with each other, in an active way.

But Koinonia is much more than just joint participation; it is also more than just fellowship-  Koinonia is communion by intimate participation.  And that is exactly what marked the gatherings I talked about in “Fellowship in the Spirit- the beautiful side of house church”.  There was a transparency and openness with one another and with God- a letting down of our guard.  It wasn’t just about participating in a song, or sharing a bible verse; it was about opening up our lives and being real with one another.  This was the key element that was going on in those gatherings that made them so special.  This was Koinonia!

Koinonia doesn’t just happen because you sit in a house.  It requires transparency; being willing to let others see into you and them allowing you to see into them.  That’s what intimacy is!  Without that openness Koinonia can never take place.  And since Koinonia is more than just fellowship with one another, since real Koinonia involves “fellowship in the Spirit” it means being real, transparent, and open and intimate with God too.  The picture is one of God and His people together as an open book, intimately sharing.  It makes me think of 1 John 1:3:

“We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ.”

The following verse in 1 John helps us to understand that true Koinonia is “fellowship in the Spirit”.  Sin, and the darkness that comes with it, destroys Koinonia. (Think Adam and Eve hiding from God in the garden.)  It’s as we come into the light with God and with each other that true Koinonia is able to take place: “But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship [koinonia] with one another, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, purifies us from every sin.”  (1 John 1:7)

Koinonia is an amazing thing!  Intimate participation with God and with each other- now that’s church!  No wonder some of my most wonderful memories of church took place in a house… it’s the perfect setting to encourage Koinonia.

I warned of the dark side of house church; now let’s look at the beautiful side of house church- fellowship in the Spirit!

There’s a reason I can’t stop desiring to be a part of another house church.  I’ve tasted it, been a part of it, and nothing compares!  My first brush with home church was when I was a young Christian.  We didn’t exactly set out to be a house church- we were simply a bunch of Christians who were desiring Jesus and the fullness of the Holy Spirit and we all found each other through word of mouth.  The desire was not for a home church, but rather, Jesus.  We wanted to know Him better and weren’t finding what we were looking for.

I remember the early days as we began to meet.  We had no building and so we gathered at a home just outside of town.  The meetings were electric!  The worship was wonderful!  There was also an atmosphere of God’s love that just seemed to fill the place: It was fellowship in the Spirit, palatable, and filled with joy!  All I needed was a taste.  I’ve never forgotten it, and have longed for “church” to be that ever since!

What marked our gatherings?  “Righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit”.   Openness and transparency were the order of the day, and so was God’s love.

Unfortunately, not everyone felt it was a “real church” while we met in a living room.  Plus, we were jammed in there like sardines!  On top of that, we didn’t yet have a Pastor and that seemed very important to some.  So the search was on for a Pastor, who came on to the scene rather quickly.  And with the Pastor came some “must do’s” and a building.  We were soon out of the living room and sitting on chairs lined up in rows.  The informal gathering gave way to structure, the free sharing faded away to sermons.  It wasn’t too long after the first division came- it was over the carpet.  I think it involved what color the new carpet should be or something like that.  And with that came the first “exit” as one of the couples left the church over the disagreement.  So much for fellowship in the Spirit and unbridled joy!  We were committed, however, and hung together, but what we ended up with was your typical church service.  It couldn’t compare to the simplicity of the living room; we all loved God, but it honestly wasn’t the same, something was missing.

A few years later I was asked to sing at a church about 45 miles from where I lived.  It was on a college campus and they held two meetings- one was at a school they rented for Sunday mornings, the other was at the Pastor’s home, midweek.  I can’t remember now which I went to first, but I will never be able to forget the contrast between the two: Sunday was as dead as could be, and midweek pulsated with life! Crammed into that Pastor’s home were a whole lot of college kids seeking Jesus.  It was electric and reminded me of my first home church experience.  There was so much participation and so much activity that the group scented the room with life!  It screamed “Koinonia!  Fellowship in the Spirit!”  I came back many, many times to be a part of it.  “This is what church should be all about”, I thought.  From time to time I’d also be invited back to sing at their regular Sunday service, and it never ceased to amaze me at the contrast between the two.  You can read more about it in my post, “Tasty Church“.

Scattered like seed among the years I’ve been a Christian are an untold number of prayer meetings.  Nobody ever really calls these “church”, but that’s where all the good stuff was taking place!  God would show up in ways that would shake us to the core.  We’d confess sin, sing praises, and call on His name- be more transparent than we’d ever be on Sunday morning.  But that’s not “church”, right?

A friend of mine started a church in his home a few years ago.  It had the marks of spontaneity and freedom I’m talking about.  But there were some who felt that meeting in the home wasn’t a “real church”.  One woman mentioned that meeting in the home actually required something from her!  She said it in a good way, and told how she’d have to come ready because you couldn’t just sleep through it unprepared.  And you couldn’t; we’d have some very lively discussions!  My wife and I loved it, until it was decided that we needed a building and the chairs gradually went from a circle to rows, and the Word of God went from being discussed to being a sermon.  The thing that had made it alive to us… the interaction, the participation, the spontaneity of the body of Christ fellowshipping in the Spirit was gone.  It wasn’t long before we left too.

And I love “sermons”.  I believe in them too.  I believe in the power of preaching.  I like to hear someone stand up and proclaim the Word of God.  There’s no reason these things can’t be done in home churches.  But there’s a beautiful side to ekklesia- it’s fellowship in the Spirit!  It’s electric when God’s people gather together like that.  It’s less than inspiring when we don’t.  If our structure strangles the life out of our gatherings, why do we do it?

Over and over again I have seen it happen- what starts out in the Spirit ends up in the flesh.  What we’re doing as the church ends up turning into what we “should be doing”.  There’s no life in “should be doing” if God is not the one who said we should. 

My most recent experience with home church lasted 2 years.  I watched my wife grow more in those 2 years than in all the previous 8 years that we’d been married!  There was koinonia!  Fellowship in the Spirit!  Our group was far from perfect.  We muddled through and hung together.  This group was somewhat different from the previous groups I mentioned.  I’d call us dysfunctional, but that’s okay- we were a wounded group of brothers and sisters in Christ who needed healing.  I don’t expect that wounded soldiers will bounce around like newborns in Christ- and we didn’t.  But I learned a lot, and came out better than when I went in, healed of many wounds.  The beautiful side of house church is fellowship in the Spirit!  The intimacy in our gatherings allowed for transparency and conversation that we never would have had sitting in a pew facing the back of each others heads.  I’m glad for our season with these precious brothers and sisters in Christ.

As I sit here writing this I can’t help but smile.  My journey with Jesus has brought me to many different places- churches that were as small as 3 and as large as 6000!  I’ve been a part of three mega churches, a small handful of midsized fellowships of 25-100, and a few house churches.  I’m grateful for them all!  But in the end, it’s the house church that has most captured my heart with it’s immediacy, spontaneity, transparency and life.  The intimacy of Jesus, and the fellowship in the Spirit with His people, is what has made house church so wonderful for me!

Imagine if church was like a restaurant and you were offered menu choices… “Would you like the lunch or dinner menu today?”

That actually reminds me of an experience I had.  I had been invited to sing at a church and was able to be at their midweek meetings which met at the pastor’s home, and also their Sunday morning worship services held at their church building.  Same “restaurant”, different menu!  My first taste was actually the midweek gathering, and what a gathering it was!  Glorious in every respect!  How can I even describe it?  It pulsated with life!  So deep was the impression it made on me that even though it’s been 15 years, I can remember it as if it was yesterday: The freedom, the joy, the awe, the seriousness, the singing, the koinonia, the presence of God… it was all soooo TANGIBLE!  “This”, I thought, “is what gathering together should be!”  Gathered in that living room were a ton of mostly college kids who sought God, and it showed.  It was “Jesus centered” in worship, and marked by authenticity, vulnerability and transparency as those gathered poured out their hearts to each other and Him.  It was also contagious.  I went back many times just to be a part of what God was doing among them.  (These return trips did NOT include me being there to sing.)  I was there because GOD was there, and His people were there, and honestly I couldn’t imagine NOT wanting to be there!

If midweek was dinner, Sunday was lunch.  Someone switched the menu!  Imagine my surprise when I arrived for the Sunday morning worship service and it was NOTHING like the midweek gathering I had experienced.  It was like going to a seafood restaurant on Wednesday with all it’s nautical decor and tasty fish, then going back for more on Sunday because it was so good… only to find out they were now a burger joint!  (And not an especially good burger joint.  It was like a dry hamburger and stale bun!  What happened to the fish??  Where was that tasty, salty, seafood?)

Many people believe that “form” makes no difference to the church.  I beg to differ!  These were basically the same people, (mostly the same college kids coming together with a wider age range of the church).  The same pastor led both meetings.  The difference was the form, and the expectations people had of living within that form of church!  You cannot tell me that form doesn’t matter.  Form and function go together like a hand in a glove.  That’s why people act a certain way at formal gatherings, and act completely different at a backyard BBQ.  It makes ALL the difference to the church what form we adopt.

At the risk of sounding, “unspiritual”, the gathering of the New Testament Church is much more like a BBQ than a black tie affair.  The gathering of the church is all about family.  It’s not about a “special event” where we dress up to look the part.  The midweek gathering of this church rang so true simply because it was true; the informal form allowed for the family style function!